from sharp objects, so I've
had to sharpen my wit.”
My dear students are always encouraging me to write down the things I teach, and largely don’t understand why I find the whole idea to be so distasteful. With that in mind, I stumbled across a quote today from the old goat himself that sums it up rather well why I don’t want to write anything down.
Before I go any further, I’d like to categorically state that I am no fan of Aleister Crowley. In my opinion he made popularized many concepts that he essentially pulled out of his ass, and his “teachings” have made my life as a Pagan more difficult. But all that aside, I did very much like this quote I recently came across, and I wanted to share it here. For the benefit of my students, for the most part, if for no one else.
“I do not want to father a flock, to be the fetish of fools and fanatics or the founder of a faith whose followers are content to echo my opinions. I want each man to cut his own way through the jungle.” ~ Aleister Crowley
Of course, I won’t be posting that anywhere near PaganCentric or in any permanent fashion on this web site. As it is, too many folks think, upon hearing that you’re Wiccan or Pagan, that you’re an acolyte of Aleister Crowley, at best, and a devil worshiper at worst, to go about quoting the old goat. But between the two of us, I agree with him on this one point.
It has been one of my greatest frustrations as a teacher that my students are often all-too-willing to jot down my words as if they’re wisdom handed down from on high. The basic tenets of my teaching and philosophy is that you must reject organized religion in any way, shape or form and make your own way. There are as many paths to The Divine as there are people on the Earth, and every one of them is equally valid. Don’t over-complicate it.
Anyway, this is a rare and official nod to Aleister Crowley. I could not have said it better myself.
I have a meeting tomorrow morning with someone affiliated with my recent enemies at Ergo On Air. Seems they want to hire me to do some consulting work concerning another Internet radio station they’re starting. Needless to say, I’m a bit wary of the whole thing. But let’s face it, money is money. And as long as the people I really have problems with at Ergo On Air are not involved, why not?
If nothing else, it gives me a reason to get out of the house. And they know me at least well enough to know that I have no real resistance to the bagels at Panera Bread. The only way they could have scored higher was to request a meeting at a Starbucks.
Anyway, we’ll see. I’ll report tomorrow.
I’ve been resisting the urge to redecorate my web site. Makes sense, right? I rarely ever use it, so it makes perfect sense to spend time re-inventing it. Maybe some part of my sub-psyche believes that if I make it prettier, I’ll be more inclined to use it. Of course, I know that’s a load of crap. That’s the kind of logic you use on newbies, and I’m using it on myself. With little success.
I don’t know. Part of me wants to simplify things. I like the way the web site looks, but it feels cluttered to me somehow. And what’s with all this dark imagery? I’m not a Goth chick by any stretch of the imaination. So why does my web site look like I am? I prefer to think my invisible bat wings can be seen by some, but it’s unlikely, at best.
So… do we upgrade or not? And if I do, when will I find time to do it? Oh, yeah. I hadn’t thought about that. In between three different active projects, I’m going to upgrade my web site. What could go wrong?
It kind of sucks to be all excited about your security clearance being upgraded, only to get into a fight with your girlfriend over it (because you can’t tell her why you needed one). As in “what do you do that requires a security clearance?” and, ”You don’t trust me enough to tell me what you do for a living?”
Well… since you put it like that, you sound an awful lot like a North Korean spy. You seem awfully interested in networked servers and hacking protocols. Hmm… where you you born again? No, I don’t want any more kimchi. Just answer the question…
I was surprised to discover over the weekend that a post I wrote in 2009 about Pagans and my personal take on Saint Patrick’s Day got a big response this year. It always spikes a bit, but this year the article received around 6,000 unique visits (that means 6,000 different people, not 6 people refreshing their browsers 1,000 times each – which would be “hits”). I don’t mention this to brag about the numbers or anything, but mostly to scratch my head and wonder the “why” of it all.
Okay, it’s possible I’m just such an amazing writer that people had to share my wit and searing insight. Or, more likely, it just got passed around more than usual this year. If I’ve noticed one trend in the Pagan community in the last couple of years, it’s a rising general annoyance with fluff-bunny Paganism. Maybe the article works because I don’t sugar-coat the issue and obsess about love and light. I dunno.
Anyway, I just thought I’d mention it. I don’t write much here these days (too frickin’ busy), but I haven’t forgotten about this web site. Maybe one day I’ll start writing lesbian erotica. If nothing else, that’ll bring in some traffic.
Links
- Pagans and Saint Patrick’s Day @ PaganCentric
I’ve been told by my Internet guru that if I wish to remain relevant I should post something to my blog at least twice a week. And while I’ve never been one to do the things other people tell me I should be doing, I wound up pondering this. Not that I have any real desire to be “relevant”. I think it’s fairly obvious by the infrequency with which I post to this blog that I couldn’t care less. But still, I keep turning that over in my mind. Is that what we’ve become as a species? At least in the Western world? Is that how you prove to the world that you are somebody? By keeping your Google search rankings high?
I used to write in my journal to keep myself sane. It made sense to transfer some of that to a blog. We are, after all, intimately connected to the Internet and the technology these days. But as I’ve cuddle on the couch every night with Sam and gone to restaurants and movies with friends, it’s seemed to me that I have a pretty full life. I’m happy. Is my life any less interesting or complete because my Google ranking isn’t as high as it used to be back when I blogged a lot more?
I stumbled into some last minute nastiness from Ergo On Air late last night. Sam and I had settled in for a nice horror movie and were about half way through it, when we took a bathroom break. I made the mistake of checking my e-mail and looking in on Facebook.
What I found stunned me. Apparently no one at Ergo On Air knows how the Internet works and have never heard of nameservers. Because their new web site had shown up and later gone away, they assumed that I was somehow keeping them from putting up a new web site on a new server. It pleases a part of me to know that they think I’m one of the Elder Goddesses of the Internet and can make arbitrary decisions about who can put up a web site and who can’t, but the reality is that the nameservers just hadn’t propagated yet. Sadly, for people who are running an Internet radio station, they know precious little about the Internet.
Anyway, what awaited me was a nasty little message from one of “The Core” trio of the so-called founders of Ergo On Air. I won’t post his name here. But his hissy fit especially disappointed me. He was one of the few people in the management down there that I really respected.
I cut my last ties with Ergo On Air today. It’s left me in an odd mood. Not because I’m going to miss it or have any regrets. Many aspects of my time at Ergo On Air were very positive. What faces me now is something I can’t quite define. It’s not anger, exactly, as much as it is a simple sadness. My last days at Ergo On Air were unnecessarily nasty. That kind of hurts me in and of itself. But that’s not really at the heart of what’s bothering me.
I got back from Florida early Friday morning just over a week ago. I took a few days over that weekend to try to process the loss of my uncle. And within a few days I was again dealing with the melodrama that swirls around Ergo On Air. After I finished my show at the studio last Tuesday, within a few hours I found myself locked out of all the Ergo On Air systems. So much for an amiable and friendly parting.
I read an article today that brought me a lot of relief, even as it reminded me of how inherently silly religion is. Mostly, my relief came because I can identify with this chica’s suffering. When I come home from a business trip or lunch or dinner with clients, the first thing I aim to do when I come through the door is get my bra off. This poor lady had been bound up for over 250 years.
Okay, I should probably explain.
I’m talking about a statue called “Goddess of Abundance”, which was made for St. James Priory in Bristol, U.K., about 400 years ago. Well, 250 or so years ago St. James Priory became the parish church of Rev. John Wesley (founder of the Methodist movement), and he hid her boobs behind a crudely fashioned lead breastplate. Wesley held sermons in the room where the statue stands, and is thought to have obscured her boobs to avoid distracting his flock during prayers (you know how men are – if breasts are present, much less bare breasts, they won’t hear a word you say).
The Goddess of Abundance had been bound ever since. And none the wiser. I mean, who knew? Conservators working on the 900-year-old building, where she graces a fireplace, found her charms concealed behind the cuirass. She has now been freed of her excess “clothing”, to the sympathetic relief of women all over the world.
I, for one, will show my support (or evident lack thereof) by letting my girls play free tonight as I’m watching television (okay, that’s pretty much every night – but it’s the thought that counts). Anyway, I’ll tip a glass of wine to the Goddess of Abundance, who has finally, after 250 years of having her boobs be bound by convention and the inappropriate giggling of men, found her breasts basking in the warm sunlight again. Ladies, we should all show our support in a moment of sisterhood with a long sigh of relief. At long last, the girls are free.
Okay, my first reaction when I heard that a North Carolina senator had called my hometown of Asheville “a cesspool of sin” was, basically, “Who the fuck is James Forrester?” It turns out he’s a knuckle-dragging, Tea Party nutjob from Gaston County who’s determined to see that people like me will never have the same rights as everyone else. But I can take that. I’ve been fighting these morons my entire life. It doesn’t bother me what they say or think about me. But when you insult an entire city? Could a politician possibly say anything more self-destructive?
I’d never heard of this idiot before this, so I did some digging. His moronic insult of Asheville came about as an extension of his war against gays and lesbians in North Carolina. I won’t be surprised when this guy is found in a men’s bathroom somewhere with pants around his ankles, being hammered by some buff young stud named Darius or Tres. That’s where these guys seem to come from. When a community leader, politican or religious nutjob has a hard-on about suppressing gays and lesbians, it’s usually because they’re running desperately from their own natural sexual inclinations and can only feel in control of those impulses if they’re oppressing other people’s urges and orientation. You deal with your own uncomfortable questions by attempting to eliminate those questions in your surroundings. But those natural urges always win out.
