I’ve made no secret of my distaste for the Twilight series. Now it seems that some folks are looking at my web site theme and wondering if I’m a fan. See, the cover of the first book is a woman’s hands cupping an apple, and my web site sort of has the same (except the apple’s in a more interesting place). It’s annoying that people are looking at my web site theme and thinking “Twilight”.
Do you have any idea how long I looked for a good WordPress theme that would sum up my dry wit and diabolical sense of irony? I mean, I get the obvious inference of the forbidden fruit and all. That’s what drew me to the design with the apple in the first place. But mine was meant to be naughty and playful. The Twilight cover seems chaste and innocent somehow. Dammit, not only do they give us pasty vampires that are nothing more than metaphors for abstinence, but they pollute the general perception of my web site along the way. Why, people might start thinking I’m virginal or something and lose all respect for me.
Okay, for the record, I am not a fan of Twilight. And if I offer you my fruit, I’ll won’t expect you to treasure the offer, I’ll expect you to get busy snacking. On that note, I’m going to stop writing before I start musing about sweetness and juicyness and various other things that end in “ness”. It would be unbecoming of me to go any farther with that.