Oreo Cookies and Breasts. A Perfect Combination!

(Click on the image to examine that Oreo cookie)

I freely admit that I’m not the warmest person in the world. I’m habitually sarcastic, challenge the unsuspecting to explain their positions, and am generally not regarded as anything approaching a “morning person” or “perky”. I can be snarky, sure, but it’s usually with a great deal of humor and genuine affection. In short, while I can be abrasive, I’m not a bitch or an asshole or whatever other label you might hang on people who annoy you. So, I was rather surprised to discover that I’m supposedly on the outside looking in when it comes to at least of the tenets of popular culture.

One of my conservative leaning friends was in an uproar this morning. I know this because she sent messages out in which she complained about being in an uproar, using generic phrases such as “this is unacceptable in a civilized society” and “the mainstream media has gone too far this time” along with such well-oiled nuggets as “liberal bias”, “gay agenda” and a few others that I hear from her side of the world more often than I’d care to admit. I didn’t think much of it. Maybe Obama used Dijon mustard on his burger again. Maybe the Democrats had re-instituted those much bally-hood “death panels” again. Or maybe she was just getting worked up that Mittens Romney is catching some heat because of his days as a corporate raid at Bain Capital. They don’t like their people having to explain themselves.

I usually steer well clear of this stuff. Not that I have a problem with challenging people on stuff, or that I’m too respectful to do so. But some things just can’t be argued. You generally can’t get into reasoned discussions about politics or religion with people who, for the most part, would have a hard time remembering which ocean is off of which coast. It’s just not productive to try to talk about the issues with people who think an uninformed opinion is just as valid as a substantiated fact.

But, try as I might, this one came around on me, anyway. I was sent an image and asked what I thought about it, with the qualifier “even you have to admit that this is beyond the pale”. After I stop bristling at the “even you”, and all the hidden meanings therein, I opened up the image to see what all the fuss was about.

It was an image of an Asian child suckling on a nipple while holding an Oreo cookie, with the tagline “Milk’s Favorite Cookie. Oreo”. My response? I laughed out loud. The image struck me as clever and funny, playful in a winking kind of way. This was what my conservative friend was so wound up over? I wrote and asked for clarification. Maybe she sent me the wrong file. Or maybe I’d just missed something.

What I received in return was a rather nasty reply about how it should have been expected that I, a lesbian, wouldn’t understand the moral issue. Because, you know, we’re all addicted to pornography, heroin and 50 Shades of Grey, I assume.

Listen, folks. That there is a breast. Not even in a sexy way kind of way. In a mother and child kind of way (Oreo cookie not-withstanding). I mean, personally I think motherhood is kind of sexy, and there’s some part of me that finds a naked breast a pleasant sight any circumstances (more pleasing that some guy’s muscled butt). But this is a non-starter. This is what people are upset about? Holy, crap! Ya’ll need to get out more!

Apparently this has been making the rounds for awhile. If you dig a bit you discover that stories first started showing up back in April. I supposed it’s only just now reaching the hinterlands of the Right-Wing movement that some of the conservative friends inhabit. The back of the bus, as it were.

I honestly don’t know what else to say about this. An ad that ran in South Korea is causing the Right in the United States to cut back-flips. And why? Because of a breast. A mother feeding her child – the most natural thing in the world. The Oreo cookie is a bonus, as far as I’m concerned. If my girlfriend was lactating, I can guarantee you I’d bring cookies to bed every night. That’s a win/win.

Okay. I’m making light of this. Mostly because it’s silly and deserving of all the derision we can come up with to heap upon it. Great Lady, is this really what we are as a country? Are we really this stupid? And aren’t there much more important issues that we should be wrangling about?

Myself… I just wish I knew where I could get a poster of that image.

About Claire

Claire Mulkieran is rumored to be a glorified computer programmer by trade, but you can call her a “Systems Security Designer.” She's also a teacher of Pagan-related spirituality and the unofficial patron saint of meandering misfits (or a delusional lunatic, depending upon whom you ask). If you're ready to read between the lines, consider her guiding motto; "Are you a figment of my imagination, or am I a figment or yours?"


4 Responses to Oreo Cookies and Breasts. A Perfect Combination!

  1. Robert August 16, 2012 at 8:53 pm #

    I think I´ll go buy myself some oreos right now… one of the best adds i´ve seen in a while. in what countries was it shown?

    • Claire March 18, 2013 at 5:44 pm #

      The campaign ran in South Korea for sure. I’m not sure about where else it might have run.

  2. Tim March 18, 2013 at 12:16 am #

    This message you received is the reason I maintain a healthy level of conservative friends. I just couldn’t make shit this good up. I would have asked her if she thought we should bomb ’em?

    You know you’ve created god in your own image when he hates the same people you do.

    In a short clip, “the right” in a “nutshell”.

    • Claire March 18, 2013 at 5:45 pm #

      Loved the video. You’re right. That pretty much sums it up.

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